O vento

Por Vanessa Campos

Todos passamos por tempos difíceis… também tive os meus. Noites insones e dias angustiantes. Parecia que estava tudo fora do seu lugar. E estava na verdade, mas quando estamos no meio do furacão não temos a consciência do quanto as coisas estão fora do seu lugar. A sensação que se tem é que os dias são eternos e o tempo não passa. Os problemas não se resolvem.

O que vou contar a vocês aconteceu há uns 10 anos atrás. Realmente antes da minha guinada para mudar minha vida. Não sei ao certo o que houve, mas, fiquei por algum tempo anestesiada e até porque não dizer, triste. Isso foi antes de me dar conta de que quem tinha que conduzir minha vida era eu.

Me lembro como se fosse hoje, morava com minha família numa casa- sobrado, num condomínio na Zona Sul de Porto Alegre. Tínhamos uma rede na entrada da casa- uma rede amarela. Como vinha sendo já algum tempo, aquele dia foi angustiante. Em crise financeira e sem muitas perspectivas de melhora, a espera que algo acontecesse- esse é o erro. Aprendi na carne- que a gente não espera- a gente faz acontecer, senão a vida vai passando … e sim, ela estava passando e eu triste, preocupada e gorda (sim…10 quilos mais gorda- porque tem pessoas que emagrecem num momento difícil- eu não!)

Obviamente que não tinha nem ideia disso tudo- exceto da minha gordura que me incomodava diariamente, mas outro dia falamos sobre isso. Então começou um temporal… vento forte e chuva torrencial. Resolvi recolher a rede- já que não queria que a mesma estragasse. Quando estava ali, na chuva, distraída… ele veio: O VENTO. Apareceu como se antes nunca tivesse existido.

Google Imagens

Fiquei parada deixando ele envolver meu corpo, esfriar minhas dores e levar minhas angustias…ele circulava em mim… como uma dança… me envolvia. Fechei meus olhos e me entreguei… como se fosse dele. Como se nada mais existisse, meu corpo era seu. E assim ficamos…por quanto tempo? Nem sei.

E assim, como ele veio ele foi- cumprindo a sua tarefa de limpar e acalmar minha alma. Renasci. Depois disso criei como hábito de entregar para o vento. E já tivemos vários encontros. Encontros felizes e outros nem tanto. Sua função é sempre a mesma: me libertar de mim mesma. Nosso último encontro foi no Beira Rio, mês passado, no show do John Mayer… ele veio e me brindou com um sentimento de alegria e felicidade…porque hoje depois que o pior já passou sou grata a tudo, porque amadureci. Virei a chave…

As coisas mudaram. Graças ao meu esforço, perseverança, teimosia e um monte de outras coisas, mas… foi ali nosso primeiro encontro que tudo começou… naquele momento que me encontrei com minha força. Me libertei  Tem vezes que ELE vem só me dar um breve oi, tem outras vezes que fica. Maior delicia… sei que encontrei meu lugar…e ELE sempre vai estar por perto quando eu precisar.

Um beijo até semana que vem!

Vanessa Campos

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